7 Years Ago Today...

I got a phone call in the wee hours of the morning

"Hello.?"
"Joanna it's me." The voice was my sisters. My heart sank and panic started to rise
"He's gone. Dad is gone. He went home."

I cried. And cried and cried.

I hung up the phone and said I would come as soon as I could when it got light and the kids were awake. I called my brother. He got in his car and drove the 5 hours to be there with us by daylight.

I cried more..harder.. William held onto me as tight as he could..My two cousins came running into the room. We all sat on my bed crying...

..then the crying turned to gladness.. laughter..happiness... greatfulness..
All for the plan of salvation. I knew my father was no longer in pain. That he could breath and be free of his mortal body that was going down hill fast. I loved/ I mean love my dad. He was a wonderful man. Not only because he was my father do I say that, he genuinely cared about people. He was always serving in the church and giving. I remember one time we were in "old Betsy" a beat up white truck with a camper. We were in the back with gifts for Christmas traveling to Los Angeles. It was raining and we were excited to get there. Then the truck pulled over. My father saw an older couple on the side of the road and he wanted to help. Now my father was no mechanic so I wondered how he was going to help. I don't know what we he did for them because we were told to stay in the truck. I do know that a little while later a very greatful women told us through the window "God bless your father! He is wonderful."

But I already knew that.

things I miss most:
-I can't talk to him and hear his voice back
-My kids won't know him
-His corny jokes
-Him calling me "peeks"
-watching him eat seafood
-him saying I should have parties at his house more often because his house gets really clean when I do
-giving me advice in my teaching and handling of my classroom
-seeing how caring/ loving he was to my mother
-watching him play with my 2 older kids (K was only 3 months old)

I love my Father and miss him every single day. I know that I will see him again and Hopefully he will be proud of the life I have lived. Of the chocies I have made. Because I know how proud I am of him. I miss you!

I would have included a picture but it was before we had a digital camera.

My Baby Boy is 18 months...

Thoughts...

This picture was taken in the van after a snow trip. His first!

My sweet little baby! He is growing up so fast! He talks a ot now and is a pretty good traveler. We (the kids and I) woke up last week and thought it would be fun to go to Btown and surprise both grandmas! They were both very surprised. It was an extremely quick trip though.

Btown looks and feels different. I don't think that we will ever call it home again. One of the kids said "we should move here to be close to cousins. But I also want our school to come and all our friends." I told them that sounded nice but impossible. He understood.

I have been trying lately to get more connected to my kids. After this weekends Wonderful General Conference, I know that it is a worthy persuit of mine. (but of course they are all home now plying/ watching a movie and I am blogging, hehe) I told my Sweetie not to long ago that we really only have 8-9 years left of teaching boy #1 and how quickly the first 10 years went. I wonder alot if I have taught him enough? He starts middle school next year. I want him to saty at the elementary him and dad want to go to "the middle school". I just hope that I have taught him enough, that he is strong enough to make good friends and good choices.

My friend counseled me the other month as we discussed this, "that you have to let them grow up and maybe he can be the light for good that the other kids need." I will take comfort in that. I will continue to love him and the others and hold on as long as I can.

Remembering..

We came back from a wonderful trip to Morro Bay. It was great to be together and watch the kids explore the beach. It is one of my favorite places on earth. While there I was remembering how much our lives have changed since 2005.

Where we are in this picture, we visited on this last trip

The above picture is what I/ we were remembering. In this photo we are with some of our best friends. We had along with, 2 other couples gone to Morro Bay to go camping at the beach. It was such a blast. These friends were the kind you could drop in on and feel welcomed. These are the friends that we would go out on double dates with. Our kids are all about the same ages. None of us knew that weekend as we sat around campfires and sun bathed on the beach that the plans we were making to make this an annual event....

....would never happen.

I didn't know it that weekend at the beach that I was pregnant with baby number 3. Our Friends guessed. It was too soon for me to know. A week later I knew. Those were our friends that we could do anything with. We had the rule with the kids : "No, blood don't come tell". Like I said none of us knew. We left first. Moving 3 months later to our current locale. Such friends were these, that they helped poor pregnant and single mom me (Honey was at work by June 1) to pack up our four bedroom house to be ready for a 2 bedroom apt. in a place unknown. The aboved photoed friends were so kind that they even drove us up with the big truck, called the EQ and told them we were here, and cried as they drove away leaving us here. How I miss my friends.

I believe that the Carter's were next to Monterey. Then the Wegwitz to Utah. And then our dearest friends, the Clarks to Illinois. She said the other day on her blog that when she married Chris she inheritaed "Friends in Laws" and now she is happy to be able to call them her Friends. I agree. When I married my Honey I am greatful to have inherited his friends, too.

None of us knew then that weekend in Morro Bay that the miles between us would be so many. But the memories of our times past and the hope for future together memories still lingers in the air and keeps my heart full.

You try and get 9 kids all under the age of 5 to all look and smile at the time

We Are Still Here

So I know I have not been so good lately about posting. But I just had to post about the Amazing Husband I have! I just came home from Lake Tahoe. I went with friends..No kids. A nice Condo. and all our Scrapbooking stuff...for...2 and 1/2 days!!! We were super excited. The glitch, we get there and no box of Cardstock....

So I call my Hero "Hunny Kathy forgot the paper"

"Oh. Too bad for her" he says.

"Could you please go get it and bring it?" I ask super nicely. Did I mention it was already 7:30 pm when I called him

He kindly replies, "If you can work it out."

AMAZING!! So I called the other Heros of my story, Auntie Gina and my Wonderful friend Rebekah..They say yes to my requests and about 3 hours later the paper arrives safely in Tahoe!

I told you my Hubby was amazing. If you want to see all the layouts I got done you'll have to come over and see.....but don't come till next week! It will take me that long to recoup and get my house clean from being gone for 3 days!

Happy Birthday Baby

So my sweet Little one turned one. He has grown so fast! The day after his Birthday he started to walk. He has amazing balance and he looks so small to be walking already. I can hardly believe that he has been in our lives for that long. His eyes are an amazing blue and his curls are starting to look messy. We are blessed to have him in our lives.

It is such a nice day.. The weather today reminds me of the Beach. I love the beach. I have wonderful memories of the Beach..It just started to rain..I love the sound and smell of rain.. My 2 little boys are playing.. playing so nicely... I love my little boys! My sweet baby will be 1 on friday.. It went so fast... I love my family.. my husband.. my daughter.. my mom (she's coming today :D) .. My sister is amazing (i hope she knows it)... I love Fall, it is my favorite season... I should clean or do laundry.. no i think i will play with my little boys... no one come over today and see my messy house... it can wait my little boys will not be little much longer...